


I am Alive  (That is the Best That I Can Do)

by musiclily88



Series: Wasted Youth// There Wasn't Much to Waste [16]
Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Anal Sex, Angst, Explicit Sexual Content, F/F, Gen, I Don't Even Know, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Mild S&M, Multi, Oh My God, Oral Sex, Please Don't Kill Me, Please Kill Me, Recreational Drug Use, Sexual Content, Shameless Smut, Smut, The S&M is very mild, Threesome, Threesome - M/M/M, Underage Drinking, Underage Drug Use, Underage Sex, What Have I Done
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-18
Updated: 2013-11-18
Packaged: 2018-01-01 23:12:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,424
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1049702
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/musiclily88/pseuds/musiclily88
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Truth be told, I feel like I got hit in the head by a brick,” Louis admitted quietly.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I am Alive  (That is the Best That I Can Do)

**Author's Note:**

> WHAT HAVE I DONE
> 
>  Title from Margot and the Nuclear So and Sos song "Dress Me Like a Clown," which is an anthem that regularly kills my spirit
> 
>  
> 
> AS ALWAYS: this is fiction, though a small, angry part of my brain likes to pretend that maybe this really happened in an alternate universe.

“No way, mate. It’s what she does,” Zayn insisted, nosing onto Louis’ shoulder. “She’s not actually hitting on you. She’s like that with everyone.”

They were still lying in Louis’ bed, though hours had passed since he last remembered why. He was unable to estimate the time, mostly because he didn’t care to pay attention to the notions like hours and minutes and months.

“How very dare you. Also you’re talking too loudly and everyone is horrible forever,” Louis muttered with a shallow groan.

“Hangover kicked in?” Harry asked, entering the room.

“Everyone be quiet,” Louis insisted, throwing his arms over his face.

“I brought you water.” Harry set it on his bedside table, tucking himself up against Louis’ body.

“Bless you.” Louis leaned into Harry and pulled Zayn into his other side.

“What’d you bring me?” Zayn asked petulantly.

“My love and affection. A small collection of knock-knock jokes.” Harry pretended to rummage in his pocket. “A piece of gum—nope, that’s just a gum wrapper. Um, 17p, a ratty bandana I periodically use to keep my hair out of my eyes, and my washboard abs. Take your pick.”

“Choose his abs. They’re fun to lick,” Louis stage-whispered, shimmying his backside into Harry.

“Stop trying to come on to me, you slug,” Harry murmured, curling into Louis willingly. “And who were you talking about before? Coming onto who?”

“Ms. Paulson, who Louis _swears_ is hitting on him. Which is bullshit, because she acts like that to everyone, plus I’m pretty sure she knows you’re gay. Because you usually spend all of chemistry making goo-goo eyes at—” Zayn stopped dead, voice drying up in his throat.

“You’re allowed to say his name. Also I’m having a sexual crisis, so stop presuming my sexuality.”

“You’re the one who told me you’re gay,” Zayn pointed out quietly, almost sound apologetic.

“I’m entitled to change my mind.”

“If your mind is in your trousers,” Zayn mused, rolling his eyes.

“Of course it is. Isn’t yours?”

“No,” said Zayn and Harry simultaneously.

“Liars. You’re teenage guys. Of course you both think with your dick.”

“Nope,” Zayn argued, shrugging as much as he was able from the prone position on Louis’ bed.

“Fine. Guess I’m just a sex-crazed maniac intent on desecrating all that you hold holy and good,” Louis muttered, poking his face into Zayn’s shoulder and shifting his hips backward gently. “Owned both your arses for a time, if you’ll recall.”

“How could I forget,” Zayn responded sardonically, “most awkwardly regrettable experience of my young life.”

“You came back for seconds, douche, don’t play that game with me.”

“I think you two need some social-skills training. And maybe a puppy to pet when you’re talking, to bring down the stress levels. An ice lolly, maybe,” Harry offered.

“A garrote would be more appropriate,” Zayn pointed out.

“I refuse to let you choke me. Just kill me in a painless way, all right? And apologize to my mum for me totally wasting my potential and youth being a miserable little cunt.”

There was a pause. “Tell us how you really feel,” Harry added, ducking forward to press a kiss to the back of Louis’ neck.

“Truth be told, I feel like I got hit in the head by a brick,” Louis admitted quietly.

“I’ll get you paracetemol, babe. Gotta take a wee anyway.” Harry clambered off the bed and shuffled into Louis’ adjoining bathroom.

Zayn sighed. “Look, shithead, if we’re not helping, we can leave. I only came here because I promised Liam I would check in.”

“And you wanted to see me in a tonne of pain, I wager.”

“There is that.”

Louis bit the inside of his cheek, considering his words carefully. “You really didn’t—you two didn’t do anything?”

“It doesn’t matter.”

“It does.”

“What, for you or for him? Or for your opinion of him and how fucking entwined it is with who he might be fucking?”

“That’s not true. I started seeing him when he was still seeing other people. Not just his ex-girlfriend.”

“He was never sleeping with his ex-girlfriend.”

“I didn’t know that at the time, did I? He’s more than just the—sum of the people he sleeps with, Christ.”

“Says the cunt who thinks with his dick.”

“You don’t know a lie when you hear one, ace,” Louis whispered before making a split decision. He rolled sideways instantaneously, straddling Zayn before either truly realized what was happening.

“You’ve never done a very good job of convincing me you know how to tell the truth.” Zayn pursed his lips together slightly, giving Louis a look of enraged consideration. Then he bucked his hips, dislodging Louis and causing him to topple sideways. Zayn, for his part, swiftly overtook him and kneeled astride him, bracketing Louis’ legs together and clamping down hard.

“Like you’re such a bastion of truth and morality.”

Louis grinned up at him, foxlike and sly. “You have no idea.” He thought perhaps his headache was gone, though his desire to burst into tears was decidedly ever-present. Some things, however, were shaping up.

He waited for Zayn to kiss him, and then he wasn’t waiting anymore. Zayn’s lips were pressed against his, hesitant at first and then rough, harsh. He pinned Louis’ arms down immediately, and he writhed on top of him, pressing down hard. Their tongues met and tangled, both trying to dominate the other. They wrestled uselessly, pausing as the bathroom door opened.

“You two getting started without me?” Harry asked, looking stark with the bathroom light shining from behind him. His eyes were hooded, and Louis’ mouth watered at the idea of getting his tongue on him.

“Wouldn’t dare,” Louis offered in gravelly tones, his voice rocky and harsh.

“So I’m meant to join, I am,” Harry added next, his smile quirked and adorable.

“Yes,” Zayn and Louis said together, their voices mingling needlessly in the air of Louis’ room.

Harry grinned and yanked his shirt off, pulling it over his head by the back collar. He tossed it away, eyeing them.

“Someone’s eager,” Zayn muttered, body still heavy on top of Louis, who had gone utterly still.

“I’ve been obvious as hell for weeks now, Z, and I’m not really used to people telling me no.”

Zayn rolled his eyes. “How frustrating for you.”

“It’s the dimples.” Harry shrugged.

“And the horse cock,” Louis offered, finally shoving Zayn off his hips. “Come here.”

“Think your bed’s big enough?” Harry asked slyly, kneeling on the edge of the mattress.

“To accommodate one more pair of gangly limbs?” Louis retorted quietly, chuckling.

“Like a baby horse, he is,” Zayn noted, moving to the side to make room for Harry on top of the bed.

Louis agreed, a bit, noting that Harry was coltish and full of manic, trippy energy. “Be nice,” he said instead, grabbing Harry by the wrist.

“I don’t need him to be nice,” Harry snapped, letting Louis drag him forward. “Also I’m relatively capable of speaking for myself.” His lips ghosted over Louis’ jaw and cheekbones, not pressing down. “Usually.”

“So’s Louis, to the point I’ve considered gagging him,” Zayn replied lightly, giving them both a mischievous smile.

“Yeah?” Harry perked up, twisting his head to stare at Zayn.

“That would not cheer me up,” Louis responded petulantly.

“It’s just something to think about,” Harry mused, turning back to Louis.

“Shit, you two, enough with the talking, all right? Fuck.” Zayn shoved at Harry, forcing him down next to Louis before giving them both an appraising look.

“Who put you in charge?” Louis whispered, fingertips moving to play at the hem of Zayn’s t-shirt.

“Shut up and take off your shirt. You look like a vagrant.”

“I’m grieving. Take my shirt off for me.”

“I’m not your servant,” Zayn retorted, leaning forward to kiss Harry. Jealousy burned, quick and hot, through Louis’ stomach. He fought it down and removed his shirt wordlessly. Zayn smiled into the kiss and Harry trailed one hand along Zayn’s neck. “Attaboy,” he added, detaching from Harry slowly. “I’ll train you yet.”

“You’re impossible,” Louis said with a sneer.

“I know. It’s gotten me pretty far in life.”

“Like into my pants?” Louis asked, voice light. He ducked a hand sideways, running his thumb along Harry’s jaw to reassure him that he was not forgotten. He would go to great lengths to show Harry that. “You just hate me because you want to be me. I see how it is.”

“Palpable sexual tension,” Harry whispered.

“And now it’s weird,” Zayn said, rolling his eyes.

“Says the one still impossibly, stupidly clothed,” Louis retorted, nudging Zayn with his foot. Then he slipped his arms sideways again, hauling Harry in front of Zayn. Louis let Harry settle into his lap before reaching up to kiss him. He raked his hands into Harry’s hair, pulling harder than was strictly necessary.

“What, you just want me to watch?” Zayn crowed, pawing at Harry’s back gently.

“You at least have to take off some article of clothing before you get to join,” Louis said, moving his lips slightly against Harry’s mouth. “Those are the rules.” Then he returned to kissing Harry, closing his eyes.

“Fine.” Zayn shucked off his shirt and moved behind Harry, planting soft kisses along the wings of his shoulder-blades. He snaked his hands forward, kneading the flesh along Harry’s ribs, pressing into his hips from behind.

Louis pulled away, feeling very in favour of the view that met his eyes. Harry’s chest stilled and he tipped his head back, mouth falling open. His eyelashes caught the light, and Louis lost coherent thought besides _beautiful beautiful beautiful._

He traced one finger down Harry’s sternum before gracing his bellybutton with attention. Louis smiled as Harry curled away from the touch, apparently ticklish. Then he unbuttoned Harry’s jeans and rucked them down carelessly, enjoying the slight gasp that echoed between their bodies.

Louis leaned back, snapping the elastic of Harry’s boxer-briefs as he did. He met Zayn’s glance over Harry’s shoulder, giving him a bright smile. Zayn for his part returned the gesture before he placed two fingers against Harry’s chin, tipping his head back in order to kiss him.

Louis watched, rapt.

Harry dragged his face away, narrowing his eyes at Louis. “Hey,” he muttered, voice gravelly, staring pointedly into Louis’ eyes. “Not about me. Come here.” He disentangled himself from Zayn and Louis, pulling the latter up to a kneeling position. Harry then moved in front of Louis, facing him and pressing feather-light kisses along his collarbones, gentle above all else.

From behind, Zayn cupped Louis’ arse with one hand and his hip with the other, biting harshly at Louis’ shoulder. Louis winced, unwilling to admit he liked the pain. His breath caught as he felt Harry unbutton his jeans, working them off Louis’ hips along with his pants. “Fuck,” Louis breathed, working into both their touches. He bent forward, pressing one hand against the bed, body framing Harry’s body as Zayn arched against his back. “This is gonna be weird, isn’t it.”

“Only if you talk about it,” Zayn rasped against Louis’ shoulder, biting in with his teeth onto the flesh there. “So stop talking about it and let it be.”

“Thanks, Lennon,” Louis muttered, his eyes fluttering shut.

“Hey, let him take these off, yeah?” Harry said, tugging experimentally at Louis’ jeans. Zayn and Louis scrambled to comply, the latter shoving off the rest of his clothing as the former grinned. Louis clambered back onto the duvet.

“Damn,” Zayn said with a wide grin. “This is—happening.”

“It is,” Harry agreed, mouthing along Louis’ hipbones once he’d discarded his clothing. “Join us any time you like.”

Zayn responded to this by pressing roughly against Louis’ back, bending him forward over Harry.

“Mean,” Louis said shortly. “Does this threesome need rules?”

“I dunno,” Harry put out, voice molasses-slow and impossibly deep. “Seems we’re just concerned with taking care of you. Does that need rules?”

“Might do.”

“How about you just say _red_ if something isn’t going right, and we’ll take care of the rest,” Zayn suggested quietly, pressing his teeth into Louis’ bicep.

“O-okay,” Louis stuttered, skin reacting to their touches with heat and fire. “I am good be-beyond measure, I am fine.”

“You are,” Harry agreed, darting up. “You’re fine.” He pulled Louis forward, making Louis arch above the mattress between Zayn’s and his own body. “You’re so hot, Lou, fuck, you’re driving me crazy.” He kissed Louis harshly, their lips melting together with hot desire.

Louis pressed forward, suddenly realizing he was naked everywhere, not just from the waist-up. His lips curled and he pressed forward anyway, curling his hand around the curve in Harry’s boxer-briefs. “I do not want to be the only naked one. Now!” he demanded, shooting Harry and Zayn imperious glares. Harry scrambled to comply, removing the denim from his lower legs before shucking off his boxer-briefs. They both watched Zayn step gracefully out of his dark trousers, pulling his pants down carefully.

“Fuck,” Harry said, voice raw.

“Pretty much,” Louis agreed, grasping at Harry’s wrist before pulling him prone, their bodies pressing together. “Pay attention to me.”

“How could I not?” Harry whispered, his green eyes gone dark. He pressed his lips against Louis’ insistently, full of need and heat. His hands kneaded against Louis’ chest, fingers pressing in hard. “I love—”

“No,” Louis demanded, rearing back. “Please don’t.”

Harry smirked. “But I love your cock, Lou, is that—”

Zayn laughed brightly, clasping onto Louis’ thighs with both hands. “Calm down. You’re all right, babe. We’ve got you.” He moved his fingers to the curve of Louis’ arse cheek, squeezing insistently.

“Why are you being nice?” Louis whispered, arching his back while scrabbling at Harry’s wrists.

“Leave’m alone please, babe,” Harry replied kindly, moving to kiss Louis’ collarbone. Louis whined slightly. “Love, come on, hush.”

“Lou,” Zayn said quietly, breaking the tension. “Is your stuff still in—”

“Nightstand, yeah.” Louis heard rather than watched Zayn open the drawer, his eyes still on Harry. He leaned in, slotting their hips and torsos and hips together. Louis kissed as though he might die if he let up. He pressed in and ground himself down into Harry’s body, pressed their skin together, full of need.

“Love you,” Harry whispered so Zayn couldn’t hear. “You.”

“Stop.” Louis’ brows knitted together, his lips pursing, his chest seizing. “Just kiss me.”

“Okay,” Harry murmured.

Louis gasped as Zayn regained his grasp on his body, opening his arse cheeks. “If this isn’t good, lemme know. Otherwise I’m going forward,” Zayn muttered, pressing a slick finger into Louis.

“Fuck.” Louis’ mouth dropped open without his permission, loving the feel of Zayn’s finger inside him. “Another, now.”

“You don’t want him to hurt—” Harry began quietly, eyes concerned.

“Maybe I want him to hurt me,” Louis interrupted

“Idiot,” Harry said immediately.

“Okay, I don’t want him to hurt me,” he agreed. “Another as soon as p-possible, please.”

“At your service,” Zayn whispered, stuttering out a laugh as he did. He eased a second finger inside Louis, fucking in and out slowly. “This time and this time only, of course. After this I go back to hating your guts.”

“Please don’t say that when you actually have your fingers _my guts,_ I mean really,” Louis spat out, voice already going ragged.

“Harry, please shut him up,” Zayn begged, voice dripping with disgust.

“That was a bit off-putting,” Harry agreed, pulling Louis into a bruising kiss. Louis steadied himself, putting one hand on Harry’s shoulder and bracing one hand around Harry’s cock. He pumped lazily, enjoying the adorable whine at the back of Harry’s throat. “Fuck, Lou,” Harry breathed, eyes fluttering shut easily. He threw his head back with abandon, exposing his throat and chin to Louis’ attacking mouth.

Louis pressed his lips and teeth into Harry’s untouched skin, simultaneously relishing the feeling of Zayn behind him. “Haz,” Louis rasped, voice bitten-off and raw. “I want my mouth on you, but I want you to have your—” he grated out, fluttering his eyelashes repeatedly.

“I’ve got you, love.” Harry shifted himself, gladly and easily shifting. He placed his head beneath Louis’s cock while allowing his own pelvis to rest beneath Louis’ open lips. Louis closed his eyes monetarily, realizing he need not even ask Harry to sixty-nine him, and yet there he was, willing to do so.

Louis sunk into it, enjoying the feeling of Zayn at his back and Harry beneath him. He let them consume him, momentarily, breath caught deep inside his chest. He relished in the feeling of Zayn forcing fingers in and out of his arse, enjoyed the way they occasionally brushed his prostate. Louis gasped when Zayn did that, and he bit his lips just as he loved the feeling of Zayn’s fingers pressing and stretching his skin. He pulsed and radiated with the attraction beneath him, loved the heat pressing in behind him. He sank his mouth onto Harry’s cock, realizing only belated that Harry was waiting for him to initiate.

Harry gaped around him, stretched his lips to swallow Louis whole. He sucked Louis’ cock in, past his tongue and down his throat. “Fuck,” Louis stuttered, shivering into Harry’s lips. He attempted to take Harry in kind but only managed to purse his lips few inches past the head.

Yet Harry didn’t seem to mind, moaning as he was around Louis’ length. Louis darted forward, licking against Harry’s dick with the top of his tongue. Louis almost gagged but instead he breathed in sharply, trying to regain composure against the overwhelming stimuli, the overwhelming _sensations_ that surrounded him.

“So tight,” Zayn muttered, ducking down to drop his forehead against Louis’ back. “Adding another, babe.” He slid a third finger into Louis, who had to remember to catch his breath around Harry’s dick. Louis slurped gently against Harry before gasping again as Zayn pressed into him deeper and _deeper._

Zayn pressed and rubbed against his prostate as Harry saw fit to suck down his cock. Louis gasped again, unable to control himself. He tongued against Harry’s slick erection with as much finesse as he could muster, but he found himself overcome on both sides.

Louis maintained equilibrium for a moment until Zayn removed his fingers. Louis momentarily removed his lips from Harry’s cock. “Hey,” he said, a mild moan in his voice.

“Not to worry, babe, one sec.” Louis heard Zayn open a wrapper and slick it up. “One sec.”

“Hurry.” He dipped his lips down again, taking Harry in as whole as he could.

And then Zayn pressed inside him, moving cock past flesh and muscle with soft abandon. He was almost sweet with it, and Louis thought perhaps Zayn was watching Harry or thinking of something lovely.

Louis did not feel lovely, though he felt fucked-out and warm. He felt worn and wanted, perhaps a little spent already, with the way he was licking at Harry’s long cock until his jaw ached. He moved his lips up and down, in and out as though the world would never end. Similarly, Zayn pressed into his back and arse, pressed into him deep. His hands gripped jaggedly at Louis’ hips. 

Zayn continued as though nothing mattered but the three of them, though he was not touching Harry whatsoever. He pressed forward gently, murmuring kind phrases into Louis’ ear until Louis hissed at him to stop.

“Stop?” Zayn stilled his hips, causing Harry to back up for a moment.

“Stop talking,” Louis demanded, bucking his hips backward to take Zayn in further.

“Right.” Zayn pressed in, almost apologetically—as though he ever _ever_ apologized to Louis.

Harry hummed against Louis’ cock, taking him in further again. Louis’ vision almost blacked out. He felt his pulse thrum, moving through his pelvis and legs as though the sensation might paralyse him.

Louis thrust forward and back. He nearly lost consciousness with the way Harry’s warm mouth felt around his dick, with the way Zayn’s cock forced its way into him relentlessly.

He almost forgot to stay alive.

He certainly forgot to round his lips around Harry, forgot to press his tongue forward. He forgot many things, just pressing into the sensation of Zayn fucking him and Harry swallowing him down.

Until he remembered to act, remembered to suck Harry down and take Zayn in deep, felt himself get taken in and forced into by them both. He felt both invaded and engaged. He worked back and forth, sucking with his lips while pressing against Harry and submitting to Zayn, his body utterly consumed. He felt raw with it.

Louis brought one hand up to fist against the base of Harry’s cock, pumping quickly while slurping the head with his tongue. And then Harry came easily, hot ejaculate spurting down Louis’ throat. Harry went momentarily slack with pleasure, his spine stiffening while his mouth fell open. Louis groaned and swallowed greedily, taking everything Harry had to offer.

Louis continued to tongue at Harry until he writhed away, whining gently at the back of his throat. Louis tingled with it, nearly laughed at the strange sensation of Harry whining against his cock.

He glanced down, watching Harry’s chest heave even as he continued to suck Louis’ dick. His lips tightened around Louis compulsively, his tongue hot against the top of Louis’ cock. He reflexively clenched around Zayn, who he had forgotten about for an instant.

“Everything ah—all right back there?” Louis asked breathlessly.

“Fine, fuckwit. You asked me to stop talking.”

“You don’t normally t-take direction well,” he responded in low tones.

“Seemed like the time and the place to—fuck, never mind.” Zayn wrapped one hand around Louis’ throat from behind, pressing in without cutting off air.

Louis felt Harry laugh, felt the laughter hum through his pelvis. Harry moved off of Louis’ cock momentarily, wiping at a stripe of saliva that hung on his lips. “He’s being nice, Lou,” he added before swallowing Louis down again.

“Ah. _Ah,_ my mistake. I’ve never seen that look on you. Caught me by sur-surprise.”

“There’s a reason for that, you prick. Shut up. I’m trying to concentrate.”

“On what, b-being a gentleman and not blowing your load inside of ten minutes?” Louis asked, breathless with laughter.

Zayn flicked Louis’ earlobe and snarled, “Shut up.” He tightened his one-handed grip on Louis’ throat.

Harry laughed again, sputtering slightly.

“Don’t choke, please. That would be an unfortunate ending to this _ah_ tryst,” Louis murmured, screwing his eyes shut tightly. “Also I like you p-pretty well.”

Harry laughed again, licking gently at Louis with his tongue. Louis, for his part, tried not to fuck too hard into Harry’s willing mouth, tried not to choke him on cock. He worked to repress the memory of Harry using the word _love,_ worked to ignore everything except the slick heat of Harry’s mouth and the hissing pleasure of Zayn in his arse.

“Pretty boy’s fine. He was made to suck cock,” Zayn whispered in Louis’ ear, tightening and loosening his grip on Louis’ throat. “He likes it.”

“Shut up,” Louis growled, bucking backward against Zayn’s pelvis. Then he shuddered forward into the heat offered by Harry’s waiting lips and throat, losing himself into the beauty of it.

He pulsed forward as Zayn ground into him, letting himself get lost it in totally. His breathing went shallower and remote, his brain gone fuzzy.

“M’close,” Zayn muttered, voice hoarse.

“Yeah, all right,” Louis said, nodding, anchoring his hips against both Zayn and Harry. He planted his hands firmly on either side of Harry’s prone torso. “Hey, babe, come for me. Come on, yeah?”

“Shut up,” Zayn insisted just seconds before coming, before grunting angrily into Louis’ ear, breath hot and wet against his skin. He spilled into the condom inside Louis, shuddering and sputtering, hot, everything against his skin like it might burn him alive.

Zayn fucked into him for a few moments more before hissing as he slid his cock out. Louis whined, sad and frustrated at the loss inside him. “Hold on babe, one sec.” Zayn tied the condom off and tossed it into the bin before pressing back into Louis with two fingers, easing against his prostate, fingers lithe and strong.

“Thank you,” Louis breathed, thrusting forward into Harry’s hot little mouth. “Fuck, fuck,” he muttered next, finally rutting into and out of Harry’s lips, against and away from Zayn’s hand inside him. He rode them both, eyes shut tight. He bit his bottom lip until he thought it might draw blood. Then he forgot to think anything as his vision went white, as he saw stars against his eyelids, as his stomach bottomed out. Pleasure and pressure built up inside him, spilling over _finally._

He came hard, abdomen muscles clenching, toes curling, hands balling into fists. He cried out once, loudly, feeling Harry suck his come down fiercely, licking against his raw cock with greed and intent hot on his lips.

“Ah, fuck,” Louis muttered, shoulders shuddering with release and relief. “Oh my god.” He held himself aloft _barely,_ his limbs rocking and nearly collapsing beneath his body.

He waited for Zayn to slowly remove his fingers and for Harry to swallow the rest of his come. Then he dropped alongside them, falling onto his back against his sweaty duvet.

Zayn leaned forward, curling onto Harry’s torso with a kiss to his sharp chin. “That was awesome,” Harry rasped out, voice spent and ragged.

“I think I died in the middle there,” Louis agreed.

“I think I’m dead now.” Zayn threw an arm over Harry’s ribs, tucking their bodies together. “Come here, jagoff,” he offered next, yanking Louis down by the wrist.

“Bet you say that to all the girls.” Louis rolled his eyes but complied. He tossed a leg over the two bodies beside his own, shutting his eyes with a grudging smile.

“I’m not talking about girls right now,” Zayn snapped.

“Dunno, Harry has a certain feminine charm,” Louis murmured into Zayn’s stubbled jaw.

“I’m taller and more muscly than both of you combined,” Harry pointed out, voice still wrecked and gravelly. “But I’m buzzing too hard to argue, so you both need to stop harshing my mellow. The angry thing doesn’t work for me.”

“It works for me,” Louis whispered to Zayn, unsure if Harry could or could not hear him.

“Yeah. Me too. Now shut up. Your girlfriend requested it.” Zayn tucked an arm around Louis’ shoulders and planted a kiss to his forehead.

**Author's Note:**

> please don't hurt me
> 
> comments crit mean slurs please just tell me what you thought I need to know
> 
>  
> 
> I BROKE MY OWN BRAIN WRITING THIS
> 
> tumblr: musiclily


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